I learnt this a very hard way, but yes it’s important to love thyself. Some things may be equally essential but nothing is more important than a healthy sense of self-esteem and loving yourself. It makes life easier, simpler and lighter. We develop more inner stability and self-sabotage less which makes one happier!
I and my wonderful gang of bindaas girls enjoy the most tantalizing part of our routine, which is our me-time…….”the heavenly evening walkathon clubbed with laughathon followed by a thrilling sporty game of badminton”. We crave for this lovely time in the evenings and wait for the clock to tick 5 pm. The central park amidst our officer’s enclave is usually our meeting place. We greet and meet each other every day with tons of bubbling enthusiasm, screams and clapping each other’s backs hugging and yelling each other’s names in happy tones, it’s a crazy and amusing moment! A third person watching us might feel as if we are seeing each other after so many years! The credit of maintaining that newness, freshness and crispiness in our relation go’s to each of us; we never ever indulge in womanly bitching and hurting each other. It’s an unspoken rule that the topics we share and chatter will be general and nothing personal should be discussed lest somebody needs a helping hand with some problem! Our happy trysts bring life in the otherwise dull corner of the park!
It is said that a woman can be woman’s best friend! That’s very true indeed! Our hearts throb in a similar way, our thought processes, our concerns, our problems, the causes of our happiness, our outlook everything is almost similar. Hence we can relate to each other’s lives and experiences and can definitely influences each other positively in crucial times and in general and thus help each other survive and succeed! We call these evenings walk, laugh and talk evenings! That is the time of the day when we keep our minds free of any baggage or stress. We enjoy our nonchalant chat and lengthy but healthy gossips a lot! Our verbal bouts of expressiveness leads to a soothing chaos but it goes well synchronized with the tweeting and chirping and chattering of birds who are drifting to their nests before sunset! Generally the walking session is followed by a small game of badminton in the officer’s mess and a bit of workout in the gym! Each part of the evening becomes interesting due to the flavor of humor and the hilarious, spicy and crazy topics! The exciting and action-packed affair ends with a steaming coffee or lemon water in the mess. The most dreadful time is seeing off each other and that is equally heartwarming! We bid an adieu to each other with the same enthusiasm and laughter promising to meet at the same spot for the most awaited “me time”! The seeing off sometimes gets delayed for 15-20 minutes as some of us have some pending important gossip/topic to be concluded! Finally we take-off towards our homes taking the familiar turns and twists! The moment we enter our abode we are greeted by the lovely longing faces of husband and kids! And it is the time for getting into action being a mother and a caring wife giving you to their demands, satisfying their queries, sharing joys and sorrows and many more….! But believe me I feel happy doing my bit of responsibilities after this me-time; I can make my children and my family more happy!
We are definitely a bunch of fabulous women complimenting each other’s psychological needs effectively! I am blessed to have such a wonderful company; it leaves a shadow of happiness and bliss in my mind! Boosts my positive energy and helps unclog my minds off negativity and bad baggage!! That one hour I spend with my friends is a quintessential part of my life! It is an hour filled with fun and happiness as we get together. It‘s less of an exercise more of thrill and it is interactive and recreational part of our routine.
Earlier when I got posted to this place I used to be a passive nonchalant walker and used to walk alone for miles, but then I noticed that even though I walk a lot, the dreadful fatigue accompanies me back home! Then I decided to take an overview of the situation and found out that whether it’s an evening walk or any kind of exercise it should not be a mechanical one or a monopolized one. So I called up a few friends of mine, who would be usually glued to the TV set in the evenings and asked them to meet at the corner of the park and that turned out to be the beginning of our wonderful me-time kitty, our first day of walk, talk and laugh. And seriously we all loved the session so much that we have been continuously doing it since then almost without a break! We dread to miss it if at all we have to! We middle aged women in forties who are about to cross the half century need something else with exercise, we need to talk our minds out and share our thoughts with somebody. So instead of only exercise, if we add something remedial or healing to it, or philosophize it in a right manner, the exercise might turn more effective and the after effects would be long-lasting. We should all do things we find peace happiness and serenity in! One doesn’t need to indulge into special classes or meditation camps etc for rejuvenation and recreation and achieving tranquility of mind. We can relive and revive our inner self by just spending time in fresh air with the people who make you happy and give you positive vibes and make our lives more resourceful! I found this treasure trove of—“walk-talk-laugh and take-in maximum O2 with good people” and I will continue this wherever I go and imbibe it as a part of my daily culture!

I call this as a spiritual perspective. A self nurturing and reviving mode. We are worthy of that “me” time. It so happens that our life becomes monotonous and tedious due to the hurries and worries! We need to take out that special time for ourselves. Otherwise our mind and body become clogged with various virtual toxics, stresses and anxieties. We as mothers, wives and professionals cannot run away from our duties and responsibilities. We need not take refuge of philosophy and religion to boost our morale and performance, to get relieved from daily life stresses and strains. It’s important that one should not allow negative toxic venomous things accumulate in our body and mind! It is important to detoxicate our minds and bodies, heart and soul on a day to day basis. And each one has to try and find out or chalk out a stress busting program which suits ones taste. Some can find solitude in writing, reading listening to music etc. But if the me-time is laced with some exercise it turns out to be more healing and useful, and if you involve a bunch of good people, it turns out to be mind blowing, as you get to interact and react with each other! The brilliant time spent for ourselves helps improve our ability and makes us more efficient for serving and satisfying our duties to the fullest and to perfection! When body and mind move together, in a rhythm of perfect bliss and happiness with some physical activity, we often experience a sense of wholeness that is not common in everyday life. In that wholeness we can feel an overall sense of healthy well-being that restores energy and life. It helps to clear away the distraction of mind chatter and to-do lists. Some people clear the chatter with prayer, sitting meditation, chanting, or dance. For me, active, walking, laughing and taking in fresh air has been an effective way to restore wholeness of body, mind and spirit I am delighted and amazed at how it resonates with my philosophy and experiences!

Every one of us, all beautiful and strong, have been through tough time. So Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world. Love yourself. It is important to stay positive because beauty comes from the inside out. I don’t consider myself a feminist, but I’m down for my first opportunity to say something to the world to be so meaningful. If you asked me, ‘What do you want to say?’ it would be, ‘Love yourself more and do take out that me-time every day, you deserve it!’.


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